Shared Meals ~ Shared Selves

Today's Loyola Press retreat reminds me of a post I wrote on my To Give God blog back in May of this year. I'll post it here again as it fits beautifully:

If you love one another God will dwell in you. And if you take yourself, your blessed self, filled with the love of God, break yourself open and give yourself to others, you are fulfilling God's plan.

Jesus repeatedly emphasized this point. He took, blest, broke and gave to His disciples at His Last Supper with them, and among the five thousand, as well as when Jesus ate with friends after His Resurrection. The theme is clear.

Jesus came for us. He took, blest, broke and gave the bread. God took, blest, broke and gave His Son. We take, bless, break and give ourselves every day as moms.

In quite literal terms, one can easily understand the effort a mother puts forth in preparing a family meal: she plans, drags out cookbooks, walks the grocery aisles, dropping food into the cart, onto the counter, out to the car, into the house, to the cupboards and fridge. Washes, chops, bakes and boils on and on until finally her meal is ready to be scarfed down in 10 minutes by her hungry brood. 10 minutes!

Hardly seems fair, does it? Took, blest, broke and gave. Nothing at all mentioned about fair. And it isn't fair. Life is not fair. We are to break open ourselves. The example is clear. Break. Not gently, carefully, tenderly peeling back layers of self. Break. What was once whole is suddenly in pieces.

Merriam-Webster's first definition of the verb "break": to separate into parts with suddenness or violence. Other definitions: fracture, rupture, violate, destroy. Get the picture, moms?

We live in a constant state of destruction - if we are doing this thing called raising Christian children the right way. We have all seen the hands-off parents. They don't get messy. They don't expend too much energy raising their children. More often than not, the energy is eagerly expended not upon the children, but on the parents themselves. Sadly, I imagine we can all quickly bring to mind one such parent.

But would you want to be that kind of parent? I never would want to be. Never was. Never will be. We need to break, to get dirty with our kids in the backyard - not buy them the NintendoDS Gardening Mama or the current cooking game. C'mon - garden, cook, get messy - for real. Be an in-the-trenches mom, not the sideline mom. Break yourself open for all the world to see.

~ Maureen :)
Shared Meals 11/23/09

Just Forgive ~ It's Easier

I think moms are the best forgivers on the planet. Mine was to me; I am to my children. Much of forgiving just has to do with realizing that by the time it gets around to forgiving our kids, they've already learned their lesson, whatever happened is over, and it's time to move on. Holding grudges is stupid, childish and unproductive.

What if God held everything we've ever done against us? Every bad decision, every thoughtless act. Nothing was wiped clean. How awful! Let's remember this the next time we elongate a bad situation, especially with our children, by gripping it tightly, feeling the hurt, unable to let go. Do unto others...remember?

~ Maureen :)
I Forgive You 11/16/09

One of Love's Challenges

Today's Loyola Press retreat asks the question, What is "challenging about living life with a loving attitude?" I think the clincher in this question is the word, "life." Life doesn't always run smoothly; it's not sunshine and yellow roses. It's hard. It's confusing. One day we are sure of something and the next we haven't a clue.

Life. I've often thought of life as a four letter word. But that's all we've got. So we have to make the most of it. For me, the most challenging part of living life with a loving attitude is when I am living that life in an atmosphere not conducive to love - not conducive to all those lovely words that St. Paul used - when I must be the one to bring the love. I'd much rather jump headlong into a basket of all-encompassing love, like I used to jump into autumn's fallen leaves. Just jump right into a place where the love already is present and overflowing. And in real life it's hard to locate those places.

So, as moms, we try to create those places, those pockets of love, in our homes for our families. Somedays are tougher than others. On those days we must remember that this too shall pass, that God is with us.

~ Maureen :)
Loving Others 11/13/09

Who Do You Say that I Am?

Jesus asks His disciples, "Who do you say that I am?"

Since I am a definite work in progress, it has taken me most of my life to feel like I know who Jesus is. And most of my life to know who I am. Funny how the two go hand-in-hand, isn't it?

As moms of young ones we wear so many hats we have to look into the mirror to decide exactly who we are at any particular moment. We are so many things - and all extremely important. As we grow older we change and learn, just as our children change and learn. We feel confused and upset and proud and worthwhile. We certainly run the gamut of emotions, don't we? Sometimes I don't know how moms survive!

I think as long as we keep asking questions like, "Who do you say that I am," we'll all be OK.

~Maureen :)
Answering the Question 11/9/09

The Balance Beam Mom

A balanced mom could be thought of as a freak of nature! I was never a balanced mom as my children were growing up. Full throttle - that was how I did it. I wished I had not, but that's how I did it. Looking back I see the error in my ways. Did I start every day saying the Our Father, spending quality time with God before accomplishing the million things I had to do? Heck no!

But that's how I begin each day now, and it centers me. Life is hard in so many ways, but beginning each new day of life in the presence of your best Friend is a great way to ease the hardship and multiply the joy.

Try it tomorrow if you don't already do it. Our Father... - You know the words.

~ Maureen :)
Balance in Life 11/08/09

Thank You, God

As moms, what's the first thing we teach our children to do when they receive a gift? To say thank you. Tiny tots are proclaimed as well-mannered if they show appreciation, and possibly deemed little ingrates if they do not. We are concerned that our children exhibit gratitude appropriately to the right person. And there's nothing wrong with that. A little more gratitude in this world would go a long way.

But let's not ever forget where the gratitude should land ultimately: at God's feet. Healthy kids, a warm home, food on the table. How quickly we may forget to thank God for the most exquisite gifts. Tonight, instead of asking for more, let's be grateful for what we have right now.

~ Maureen :)
Serving Others 11/6/09

Expect to Hear God's Voice

Wow! Not sure I ever specifically remember reading this verse before from Deuteronomy:

"It is the Lord who marches before you; he will be with you and never fail you or forsake you. So do not fear or be dismayed."

Again, I say Wow!

Moms need black and white sometimes. Short and sweet. Simple. I guess this is one of those times for me. We moms always seem to be so darn busy that we really don't want to take the time to decipher our lives. We go from this to that and the next thing, and before we realize it 20 years have zoomed by. That's so awful - but so true.

Well, these words of God, this promise from God, is also true. It is simply a lovely and powerful Bible verse. Think on it. Pray on it. But more than anything just believe it. Accept it. Copy it down and put it in your purse, on your mirror, in your car - anywhere where you can see it often.

God is calling us every day to hope and trust in Him. Every day! Not just when He gets around to it. Let's be open to Him in our lives. As you know I am recovering from the flu. I have had much time to reflect, to "hear" what God is trying to tell me. And I have heard. I've heard God's message to me in paperback novels, in songs on the radio, and movies on TV. God doesn't speak exclusively through the Bible. The more I listen the louder God talks.

Expect God's voice. He won't let you down.

~ Maureen :)
God is Near 11/05/09

A+B=C

Peace exists "when Heaven and earth 'connect,'" so says today's Loyola Press retreat. How true! And lately Heaven and earth haven't exactly been connecting around the old homestead. I've been sick; my men have been sick - yuck! I'd ask for sympathy, but chances are, you or yours, have been sick too, and don't feel like extending sympathy. I understand.

Back to the peace - or lack of it. If you are a mom, you know that peace doesn't just miraculously appear for your family. You strive for peace. You engineer familial peace. And sometimes you drop the ball. You fumble. And at other times unavoidable circumstances derail.

I feel I've been fumbling a bit. THERE'S SO MUCH TO DO! ALWAYS! I want things, I need things. But so does everyone else in my house, and my friends and my parents. I seem to be needed somewhere 24/7. That sentiment does not evoke peace.

So what usually happens? Eventually, I get sick. And as you know, I got sick. Knocked me on my butt for a week and a half. I read three books - fun books. And slept and rested and unplugged. Felt more discouraged, but then gradually more peaceful. Peace. There's that word again.

The peace came when I began to set some new priorities, and guess what? They have to do with making Heaven and earth "connect." So when I experienced today's retreat I felt a tangible verification that my plan is the right plan. And that makes me happy.

I wish you all the determination to make Heaven and earth meet in all of your households. The season for peace is nearing. If we, as moms, don't have it, how can we give it?

Maureen :)
Peace of Mind and Heart 11/3/09